Welcome 2025/26 School Year!

I asked Google's AI, "Are parents tired of reading welcome-back letters from teachers?" It told me they are not unless the letter is generic and impersonal. We'll see if it's right. In general, I think technology is a good idea, but I have seen all of the Terminator movies. So, I share at least some of Sara Conner's skepticism.

I am enthusiastic about private music lessons, so of course I am looking forward to the coming school year. Ever since my own experience with private music lessons began 36 years ago, lessons and music making have been a source of great joy for me. I believe my students can experience joy, and maybe even passion, from playing music. But I also know that music learning, like any pursuit worth doing, comes with its share of frustration.

That's Just How Music Learning Works

When we set out to learn music, we begin to play we realize that what's coming out of the instrument is not what we were hoping for. We want the music to be perfect immediately, but instead we realize 'this is going to take work.' Focusing our attention on something we can't have is the definition of frustration.

Frustration during practice is normal. It certainly is not a sign that something is wrong, but rather an indication that your child is growing. Moods, motivation, practice time- all of this fluctuates. How do you support a child to learn to play an instrument with all these variables?

Practice Routine

Consistent actions accumulate over time. Especially with children, prioritizing a practice routine over things that fluctuate, like their mood, is quite useful. Practice is not about forcing a child to feel a certain way; it's about helping them build a habit that will lead to long-term success. Your support in creating and maintaining this routine will make a significant difference. Plus, you are not a bad parent if you require that your child follow a practice routine.

Empathy

Practice is a behavior and a practice routine is a limit that an adult places on their own behavior or that of a child. Accepting a limit is hard, especially on young children. So, I can't talk about healthy limits on a child's behavior without mentioning empathy. Empathy helps children accept limits on their behavior. My hope is to normalize practice frustration not so that the feelings can be dismissed, but rather to encourage more fruitful dialogue like, "What makes this so hard?"

Dr. Becky Bailey describes it best on page 235 of her book Conscious Discipline:

"Conscious empathy involves listening while holding a mental image of the upset person as capable of handling the emotions and situation at hand. It resists seeing those in distress as victims and refuses to judge the situation as negative (even if the other person is heavily invested in that perception). If you are able to hold an accepting space for others so they may process their emotions, you practice conscious empathy."

Benefits

Something very interesting happens to music students who are required to practice. These students begin to learn that their feelings don't necessarily need to dictate their behavior. There is a word to describe this characteristic- it's discipline.

But the benefits don't stop there! Research points to a boon in reading skills, memory, attention, fine motor skills, auditory processing, spacial reasoning and the list goes on and on. Northwestern University has a very interesting Auditory Science Lab. The NAMM Foundation links to a lot of great research too.

Fine

I am so excited to be your and/or your child's private music teacher this school year. Be on the lookout for many more bad jokes, a Halloween Recital in October, some Taylor Swift, Imagine Dragons, and probably, Chopin.